"Spring" has yet to arrive here in Rouen and it is still incredibly chilly at night while talk of summer vacation has begun. After this week, in fact, I will officially be on break as I won't be working any more until my week-long summer camp that I work for the first week of July. It'll be nice not to have to work, but I'm hoping that I can get some traveling done since I have barely traveled at all this year. I'm thinking about going to the UK for a bit to take a nice look around the country and visit friends as well as Germany. However, I really want to take more small trips around France to see more of this country. I've been to the north a tad and the south, but I still have a lot to see and experience here.
Job hunting is still happening and I did have an interview for the lecturer position I mentioned in a previous post last week. We'll see where things go from there and hope that sometime between now and then I'll get some sort of job. I'm looking in France, in the US, and somewhat around the world at this point since I'm still not quite sure of what I want to do or where I should go from where I am right now. Sure, I really would like to stay in France, but, again, life is life and I guess I have to see where it's going to take me. Looking for work still depresses me a bit and gets me going on vicious cycles of trying to figure out answers to impossible questions such as the meaning of life (not even kidding on that one...) or what I really, truly want to do with the rest of my life. It's never bad to reflect on these sorts of questions, but when I get going on them day after day, it just gets me down and makes my life much harder than it needs to be. So instead, I look for potential appartments for next year which cheers me up for some reason.
Perhaps one of the biggest things that's been going on through my mind lately is how trapped and blocked I feel by every move I want to make. Thoughts get into my head and spin around until sometimes I litterally become dizzy. I'd like to find an appartment of my own, but I really can't get one at this point because I have to face the very real possibility that come September, I may have to go back to the US. I'd like to travel a lot, but with not much future income coming my way, I have to watch my finances carefully so that I can still afford to live for a while. I'd love to buy some kitchen equipment like pans or a nice mixer, but since those things are so heavy, I could buy them only to resell them if/when I have to leave. I'd like nothing more than to have some idea of where I'm going and what I'm going to do, but for the moment that seems like more and more of a dream to me. Days can start out so positively then within a few minutes turn into headaches where I don't feel like doing anything. It has been getting better recently with some extra income that landed in my bank account recently and I feel like getting away to travel for just a bit could help occupy my time a bit more so I don't think as much about what's going on and just deal with the important things one at a time.
Anywho, I had a great weekend this week and last weekend was wonderful as well! It was the birthday of my French "dad" and I even got to make the birthday cakes :) Yes, 12 birthday "cakes" in 2 days was what I did! It was exhausting and a bit frustrating, but fun at the same time. There are a few pictures floating around somewhere of the finished products of them, but I haven't yet seen them and I was too busy serving to take pictures while they were all nice and pretty. Hopefully I'll get some soon, but here are the ones that I took beforehand.
As always, I hope everyone who reads this is doing well, and if you have any questions to ask me, don't hesitate to comment!
